For a “security guru,” John McAfee is not the sharpest pencil in the box. He created a website, http://www.whoismcafee.com, to track his own hiding, which is now claiming the following:

We have received an unconfirmed report that John McAfee has been captured at the border of Belize and Mexico. More information as it is received.

I can’t help but giggle at the irony of the security guru not being able to keep himself secure against the authorities – maybe a little less computer screen and a little more real life would have benefited Mr. McAfee!

* * *

John McAfee was (and maybe still is?) in hiding, in what CNN refers to as a “tropical island paradise,” where they were able to interview him after “a secret phrase, a mysterious driver and a circuitous route full of left turns, right turns and U-turns.” The 67-year-old American is wanted for questioning in connection with the murder of his neighbor, Gregory Faull, who was found dead in his home on the Caribbean island Ambergiris Caye.

Authorities believe the dispute between the security giant and his neighbor started with the dogs. McAfee had called the police the just days before the murder to report that his four dogs had been poisoned, naming the neighbor as the culprit. Two days later, Faull was discovered in his living room with a gunshot wound to the head.

Now, McAfee is acting like a paranoid conspiracy theorist from the movies, telling CNN he has gone through some 200 disposable (“burner”) phones since the murder. Not surprisingly, he maintains his innocence in the alleged crime, and says he will not show his face publicly until the real perpetrator is arrested and charged.

Security mogul John McAfee was officially taken into custody in Guatemala this week for suspected illegal entry into the country.  In case you have been living under a rock, McAfee is wanted for questioning in relation to the apparent homicide of his neighbor.  Now, lawyers for McAfee are trying relentlessly to keep him from getting shipped back to Belize to face the music.  They are arguing for asylum, but Guatemala’s Supreme Court found there was no basis to the claim. 

Then yesterday, in a big dramatic flurry, McAfee was rushed to the hospital, surrounded by paparazzi, with “cardio vascular problems.”  In a later interview, McAfee’s attorneys told the press he had “suffered from a nervous breakdown, but tests showed he did not have heart problems,” according to CNN. 

In video footage of McAfee being wheeled into the hospital on a gurney, he appears passed out or unconscious until the nurses start to take his clothes off, when he magically regains his strength enough to say “please, not in front of the press, please.”  Funny how he conveniently came back to life to keep reporters from getting a look at his stuff, eh?  This guy is a walking three-ring circus!

With respect to his legal problems, McAfee claims that he is being persecuted by authorities in Belize, and was previously saying he would remain in hiding until they found and prosecuted the real killer.  McAfee’s neighbor was found dead just two days after McAfee had reported the neighbor for having allegedly poisoned and killed McAfee’s four dogs.