“Swatting” is when people call the police to report a fake crisis, usually a shooting or a fire, currently going down at another person’s house. Police then send out SWAT teams and helicopters, only to find out the report was but a hoax. (Oops!) Lately, Los Angeles is being bamboozled with incidents of swatting, including at the homes of regular citizens and those belonging to celebrities Justin Timberlake, Miley Cyrus, and yesterday, actor and comedian Russell Brand.

I have to admit: it is kind of funny to picture SWAT teams surrounding the homes of some of the more annoying celebs. (Other “victims” include the Biebs, Chris Brown and Simon Cowell, all of whom I think could use a little messing with.) HOWEVER, the ridiculous price tag on each call is anything but funny. According to LAPD, each incident can cost up to $10,000 depending on the number of officers and helicopters dispatched, leaving taxpayers to bear the burden of these annoying shenanigans.

New Anti-Swatting Law

California lawmakers are eager to crack down on the $10k pranks, and have already pushed a bill through the Senate Public Safety Committee to crack down on the swatting. Championed by Senator Ted Lieu, if passed, the bill would authorize judges to make perpetrators of swatting fit the bill for costs incurred by the responding law enforcement. In the case of children making the call, the bill would also allow imposing the fine on the parents of the accused, regardless of their knowledge of or participation in the stunt. Ashton Kutcher’s house was the target of swatting back in 2009; a 12-year-old boy was charged and later admitted to orchestrating the prank, along with another call-out to a Los Angeles bank.

Other anti-swatters are trying to make it a felony to falsely report a crime, creating the potential for real prison time if convicted. In 2008, a Washington state swatter was sentenced to two and a half years in federal prison for his participation in an elaborate swatting hoax intended to discombobulate law enforcement. In that case, there were some 250 “victims” and about $250,000 worth of damages.

Bystanders Beware!

Along with the ridiculous price tag, police here claim that swatting is also extremely dangerous and have repeatedly warned that “it’s only a matter of time before someone gets hurt or killed as a result.” At first I thought this was a bit melodramatic, but the more I think about it, the more I agree. Why? Because LAPD is maybe the most trigger-happy law enforcement around! Imagine how easily one of them could mistakenly fire on a dog-walker or other innocent bystander while responding to one of these swatting calls. Remember the Deadly Dorner Drama? During the manhunt, police shot two WOMEN in a car that they thought looked like Dorner’s without making any attempt to verify their suspicions whatsoever!

Boy Who Cried Wolf-Much?

Perhaps the most damaging impact of the swatting shenanigans is the future action – or, inaction – of LAPD, as a result of all the pump fakes. I actually heard it on the news (ABC Local News) that police will no longer send out full SWAT teams based on phoned-in reports. Rather, they will only send “a few deputies” to check it out first. In other words, next time there is a serious crime in progress, a couple of lambs (pigs?) will first be sent to slaughter and THEN we will bring out the big guns. Hopefully there is no one on the brink of death, in need of an ambulance and full emergency response or a house burning down, right? Awesome plan. I mean, I get it – Los Angeles certainly does not have the extra money to spend on these little shithead pranks – but I would still rather err on the side of safety when it comes to emergency response.

The current bill won’t see the California Senate floor until at least June or July and if approved, will go into effect as early as September. Stay tuned for developments in anti-swatting laws and ensuing shenanigans!

The manhunt continues in Southern California as authorities offer a whopping one million dollars to anyone whose information leads to the capture of former LAPD officer and accused killer, Christopher Dorner. For the last several days, the story has plagued our news broadcasts, from Riverside to Big Bear, and now police say there is evidence that Dorner left California and fled to Mexico in order to evade capture.

In case you missed it, Christopher Dorner is accused of murdering two civilians before ambushing a police patrol car stopped at a traffic light and killing one police officer. Dorner, a 33-year-old brick house of a man, has been on the lamb since last Thursday. According to his extensive manifesto (published online), Dorner was targeting members of LAPD and their families who were involved in his being fired from the force back in 2009. In the first paragraph of his tyrade, Dorner tells friends and family “Unfortunately, this is a necessary evil that I do not enjoy but must partake and complete for substantial change to occur within the LAPD and reclaim my name.”

So…Why Was Christopher Dorner Fired From LAPD? The short version: he lied about one of his training officers having kicked a mentally ill man during an arrest.

The Background

Christopher Dorner and his training officer Teresa Evans responded to a call out for a disturbance at a San Pedro hotel. When they arrived, the subject was uncooperative and after throwing a punch at them, Evans used her electric Taser to subdue the man. Two weeks after the fact, Dorner went to his supervisor (allegedly in tears) to report that Evans had kicked the man in the face, shoulder and ribs. Evans, according to Dorner, had instructed him to leave it out of their initial report.

The "Investigation"

An internal review ensued and later determined that Dorner’s report was a lie and charging him with having made false accusations. There were numerous witnesses who testified that there was no kicking involved in the arrest; further, there was no evidence of the kicks on his clothing and the man’s injuries were apparently inconsistent with having been kicked. As for the defense, the victim’s father testified that his son had told him he’d been kicked, but the Board found that due to the victim’s mental illness, he was not capable of giving a reliable account of what happened.

The Findings

The initial internal affairs investigation officially found that the kicks did not occur. In 2010, in one of Dorner’s appeals, Judge David P. Yaffe reviewed the case and said he was “uncertain whether the training officer kicked the suspect or not” but nonetheless upheld the Board’s decision to terminate Dorner’s employment. Now the case has been reopened, police citing their desire to show the public that Dorner’s termination was justified. Police Chief Charlie Beck told reporters “It is important to me that we have a department that is seen as valuing fairness.”

The Charges

Today, Christopher Dorner was officially charged with one count of first-degree murder and three counts of attempted murder in Riverside County, California. Prosecutors have also alleged “special circumstances,” since the killing was of a police officer, meaning that Dorner now faces the possibility of a death sentence if caught.

My 2 Cents

No way Christopher Dorner is going to be taken into custody alive. In fact, I would be shocked if it ends with anything short of a guns-blazing battle royale, possibly (and God forbid) claiming additional innocent lives.

HOPEFULLY this will shed some light upon LAPD’s internal review system, which is the most inbred, pro-blue blood institution around. Without talking you into dizzy circles, suffice to say that the Board – comprised of appointed lackeys with self-interest for days – does little to ensure justice within the Department. I learned all about it during law school in one of my favorite classes, Police Practices, taught by triple threat (cop-lawyer-professor) and personal hero Steve Lurie, who too agreed that the department’s review for allegations of excessive use of force was tantamount to a kangaroo court.